If I Were A Horse

from by Marc Gunn

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  • Hear ye! Hear ye! Let it be known that ye first edition of The Medieval Virgin is now available. This magazine chronicles the struggle felt by virgins and dragons alike as they seeketh to answer ye age-old question, "Do virgins taste better than those who are not?"

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about

I wrote this song in college. It wasn't supposed to be any grand masterpiece, just a stupid, catchy song. For some strange reason, I added it to my CD, What Color Is Your Dragon?.

lyrics

If I were a horse and you were a mule,
My heart would break all the same.
I'd cry on your tail. All the while would I wail
And refuse to eat my grain.

Oh, listen to this sad story.
Take head to the message I don't purvey.
Cuz it'll make you feel blue, and I'll cry boo hoo.
And I'll have to blow snot on my sleeve.

If I were pig and you were a hog,
Would that make us compatible or insane.
We'd roll in the mud, and we'd hug, and we'd hug.
And we'd play all day in the rain.

If I were a cat, and you were a dog,
Would you love me or tear me in two.
Bite off my tail, rip the whiskers from my cheeks,
And spill all my blood in the street.

Did you listen to this sad story?
Did you take head to the message I didn't purvey?
Cuz it'll make you feel blue, and you'll cry boo hoo.
And you'll have to blow snot on your shirt.

credits

from What Color Is Your Dragon?, released August 7, 2008
Marc Gunn: autoharp, vocals
Lyrics and music Marc Gunn

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Marc Gunn Birmingham, Alabama

Marc Gunn is a rhythm and folk musician inspired by Celtic culture, science fiction, fantasy, and cats. He breathes new life into the autoharp, which continues to surprise musical veterans and fans a like for it’s unique sound and spirited energy. It’s like a satirical jam session between The Clancy Brothers and Weird Al Yankovic. It’s Celtic music, the traditional and the twisted. ... more

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