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The Smial or the Tree

from Sci Fi Drinking Songs by Marc Gunn

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    In one hand, a pint of Mudder’s Milk, in the other a bottle of Romulan Ale. Sing and laugh along with this Celtic Geek musical gem.

    A Jedi saunters up to the bar at the Pub at the End of the Universe. “Gimme a Romulan Ale.”

    “I’m sorry,” the Publican replies, “That’s still illegal.”

    “What?! It’s been 52 million years and the universe is about to explode. Surely, you can serve it NOW?!”

    “I’m sorry, Sir,” he replies apologetically, “And please don’t call me Shirlely.”

    “All right, I’ll take a mudder’s milk, Monahan’s, please”.

    Drinking can be found throughout the universe from Earth to Praxis, from Canton to Skaro. Come on, you know Davros was drinking something when he came up with the Daleks. In fact, I think The Doctor was there drinking with him.

    What’s just as prevalent as drinking in the galaxy?

    Drinking songs.

    In fact, Sci Fi Drinking Songs aren’t just about drinking. They’re fun songs that you and I can sing along to while we’re in cars traveling to a Sci Fi Convention or Renaissance Festival. They’re songs we put on in the background while playing Dungeons & Dragons or Magic:The Gathering.

    Sci Fi Drinking Songs are fun songs designed to make us laugh, cry, smile, and above all SING!
    Get a free songbook with purchase!

    Plus, you'll also get lyrics never before revealed to the naked eye. It's all there in this fantastic songbook.

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    I present you with a shirt that's several years in the works. The front of the shirt features a quote from the "Jedi Drinking Song Prequel".

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A fun parody of a parody. Turlough O’Carolan is credited with writing a brilliant melody that was used for the tune “Rising of the Moon”. That was later parodied in a song called “The Orange and The Green”, which was then turned into a hobbit song by my friend Nancy Flynn. A “smial” is a hobbit hole that was dug into hills and mounds for living.


Oh, my father was a halfling, from Hobbiton was he
My mother was an elfmaid, and in Mirkwood dwelleth she
They met once, only briefly, under an old oak tree
It was a worthy venture. Nine months later there came me

Oh, I feel so strange and mixed up, I hardly know myself
For my father was a hobbit and my mother was an elf

Too tall to hide inside a log, too short to climb a tree
Dear Dad was only 3 foot 6 while Mom was 6 foot 3
I’ve bright blue eyes and long blond hair, so how do you suppose
I ended up with curly braids a growin’ from my toes

Raised in Thranduil’s castle, the forest was my home
But always over hill and dale I felt inclined to roam
Every evening Mum and I through the woods did stroll
Til one night just like Dad, I went a-rollin’ down the hole

One day upon his doorstep I per-chanced to be
And when I rang the doorbell, he invited me to tea
We began to get aquainted as he showed me round the place
“So, how’s your Mum?” he asked of me, a sly grin on his face

Now as the heir apparent to all their worldly goods,
I’ve half a hillside in the Shire and acreage in the woods.
They took a ship to Valinor and sailed across the sea,
And left me on my own to choose the Smial or the Tree.


from Sci Fi Drinking Songs, released September 18, 2014
lyrics Nancy Flynn music Turlough O’Carolan
parody of “The Orange and The Green” and “Rising of the Moon”




Marc Gunn Atlanta, Georgia

Marc Gunn is a rhythm and folk musician inspired by Celtic culture, science fiction, fantasy, and cats--Sci F'Irish music.

He breathes new life into the autoharp, which continues to surprise musical veterans and fans alike for its unique sound and spirited energy. It’s like a satirical jam session between The Clancy Brothers and Weird Al Yankovic.
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