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The Truth About Dragons

from Pirates vs. Dragons by Marc Gunn



Dragons aren't no wusses. They're smart and deadly beyond belief. You'd be wise to stay away.


A dragon is not a big lizard with wings
Despite what some people may say.
Look at the size of my cranium, dude!
I’ve a brain half as big as L.A.

If you set me a puzzle or a problem to solve
It will take only instants to do.
And I’ve written a treatise on Immanuel Kant
Between giving kids tours at the zoo.

I could beat your best man in a battle of wits
With half of my brain drunk on ale.
I’ve more smarts in one fang than you have in your head,
And that doesn’t add in the tail.

I’ve a doctorate in business, another in law
And I taught for a while at the U.
But school was a bore so I opened a store
And it’s made me a millionaire too.

So, yeah, I’ve got gold, and a few gems around,
But I keep the bulk stashed in CDs.
I’ve more wealth it is true than Trump or Gore do
But I don’t plan to share with you fleas.

My cave has the latest in surveillance, you see,
I’ve cameras, and lasers galore,
And whenever I fear someone’s on their way here,
I put in a few dozen more.

The next time you think that a dragon’s fair game
When you’re looking for something to steal.
Remember that I am real good with traps
And it’s probably less than ideal.


from Pirates vs. Dragons, released July 27, 2016
lyrics Rie Sheridan Rose, music Marc Gunn




Marc Gunn Atlanta, Georgia

Marc Gunn is a rhythm and folk musician inspired by Celtic culture, science fiction, fantasy, and cats--Sci F'Irish music.

He breathes new life into the autoharp, which continues to surprise musical veterans and fans alike for its unique sound and spirited energy. It’s like a satirical jam session between The Clancy Brothers and Weird Al Yankovic.
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