Irish Drinking Songs for Cat Lovers

by Marc Gunn




No, really. I know. You're thinking, “Is this guy psycho? Or drunk? He rewrote a bunch of Irish songs with lyrics about cats? That's just crazy!”

I know, I know. They keep telling me that. And maybe I do love cats a bit much, but c'mon why not.

Imagine for a moment all of the crazy little things your cat does. Racing around your home. Climbing on door frames. Napping in the oddest positions. Snuzzling up to you. Waking you up in the morning. Begging for food. Having them rub their tail against your leg.

The list goes on and on. These are just a few of the many pleasures of owning a cat. All the beauty, the sweetness, and all the madness, that's what this album is all about.

I wanted to share my experience with one of life's most-amazing creatures. I wanted your mind to meld with mine, so you can experience my cats, and I can experience yours. This is just a small sample of the purr-fect world awaiting you when you purchase a copy of this album.

There are many more furry smiles to come. So curl up in a corner. Listen. Share the music with your friends. Then tell me the hypnotic story about how you were adopted by your cat(s).

Slainte! Mreow!


released January 1, 2005

Front Cover Photo by Kristen Roger. Back CD Cover and Celtic Cat Logo by Ingrid Houwers. Produced by Ari Koinuma.




Marc Gunn Birmingham, Alabama

Marc Gunn is a rhythm and folk musician inspired by Celtic culture, science fiction, fantasy, and cats. He breathes new life into the autoharp, which continues to surprise musical veterans and fans a like for it’s unique sound and spirited energy. It’s like a satirical jam session between The Clancy Brothers and Weird Al Yankovic. It’s Celtic music, the traditional and the twisted. ... more


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Track Name: Wild Kitty
Well I’ve been a wild kitty for many’s the year,
And I found a nice pub that serves milk mixed with beer.
This makes me quite happy, so I’ll purr with galore.
Cuz I never will be a wild kitty no more.

And it’s no nay never, (meow, meow, meow, meow)
No nay never no more, (meow, meow)
Will I be a wild kitty. (meow)
No never no more.

It began at an ale house while hunting for fish.
The back door was left open. Some food they’d not miss.
But the landlord he caught me and took me out back,
And said if you’re good I’ll bring milk for to lap.

The landlord came back with some milk from the bar
But he thought it’d be cute to add whiskey from the jar
He layed it before me. I sniffed cautiously.
Then I lapped the milk down and passed out on his knee.

Well the landlord he took me inside to take care
When I woke I refused to drink milk without beer.
So now every night I stumble galore.
I don’t land on feet, but I’m wild no more.
Track Name: A Cat Named Rover
A cat named Rover came over the hill
Jumping through the grass so shady
He yowled and meowed till some stones flew down
But he won the purrs of a lady kitty.

Meow-dee-do, meow-dee-mew-dah-day
Meow-dee-do, meow-dee-day-dee
He yowled and meowed till some stones flew down
But he won the purrs of a lady kitty.

She left her favorite scratching post.
She left her Manx cat lover.
She left her human and fancy feast bowl
For a yowling cat named Rover.

She left behind her feathery cat wand
The shoes she shredded of Spanish leather
They yowled and meowed, then some boots flew down
As they ran off together.

Last night, she napped on a goose feather bed,
Ripped a hole in the covers.
Tonight no feathers will be in her mouth,
As she sleeps next to a cat named Rover.

Her human walked all around the hills.
He searched the valley all over.
Sought the Persian that he combed each night.
And that cursed tomcat named Rover

He came at last to a grassy knoll
With a willow tree’s leaves bent over.
A large cat sat still as he cleaned his tail.
He recognized the cat named Rover.

“How can you leave your plush cat bed?
The finest fancy feast can ripped open?
How can you leave your Manx cat love,
All for a cat named Rover?

“He is no dog despite his name.
You’ll never catch him rolling over.
He’ll sire strong kittens and win any cat fight
Because he is a cat named him Rover.”
Track Name: The Mining Ship the Red Dwarf
The mining ship the Red Dwarf
Is careening off into space.
Three million years its been adrift.
You’re the last of the human race.
You were frozen in a stasis tube
For saving Frankenstein
The cat race Grandma was in the hull
When it became “Gazpacho” time.

And it’s cheer up MREOOW!
How I’m looking now?
On the mining ship the Red Dwarf
I’m the coolest Cat around.

I’ll have one fish for my breakfast.
I’ll have two fish for my tea.
I’ll learn to fish from the food dispenser.
Six fish is all I need.
I wear my suit of gold lamee
And earrings like fish bones
I spend my day investigating
And playing with my Yo-Yo. (Look at my shiny thing)

If the despair squid gets his way
I may lose my cool and flip.
Imagine I have buck teeth so big
Druids go there to worship.
Some may say that I’m a shallow guy.
But the Inquistor knows it’s true.
But an arse like mine is quite divine
So have a look or two.

Here’s a health to my man Ace Rimmer
Likewise to Frankenstein
Here’s a health now to that mirror there
I can see I’m looking fine.
My organs are color-coordinated
My stomach is feng shui
My heart it thumps with a funky beat
Like a salsa dance gourmet.

I’m gonna get you little fishies
I’m gonna get you little fish.
I hope I don’t break another tooth
In a future echo rift.
Then I’ll play a game called Better Than Life
Have a mermaid girlfriend
She’s top half fish and lass below
And tastes good on both ends.
Track Name: When Kitty Eyes Are Smiling
There’s a kitty eye, watching something dart by
Though he may’ve seen nothing at all.
Be it game or alive, he wiggles his hind
Then tackles it with his claws.
For a cat roams around like a lion on the prow
And jumps on your shelf with a sprong
So he can meow from great heights and croon through the night
Til it all crashes down, then he’s gone.

When kitty eyes are smiling
All the world it is their play
With a leap a cat is soaring
Now your shoe lace is his prey
When kitty hearts are happy
Against your leg, you’ll feel them rub
And when kitty eyes are smiling
Sure, you can’t help falling in love.

When your sweet kitty’s kneeding, some biscuits and dreaming
His cat motor purrs with delight
Sure, he wakes with sleepy eyes, then the sofa he spies
And scratches his claws on the side.
While you’re writing a song, you’ll know something is wrong
When he lies on your paper to rest
You will laugh all the while and then you will smile
As he falls asleep on your desk.

When kitty eyes are smiling
All the world it is their play
With a leap a cat is soaring
Now your sporran is his prey
When kitty hearts are happy
Against your leg, you’ll feel them rub
And when kitty eyes are smiling
Sure, you can’t help falling in love.
Track Name: Lord of the Pounce
I pounced in the morning when the world was begun.
I pounced on the moon and the stars all for fun.
I leaped down from heaven, and I pounced on the earth.
When I pounced my first mouse, I had my birth.

Pounce, pounce, wherever you may be
I am lord of the pounce, said he.
I'll run under feet, wherever you may be.
And I'll leap on you in the pounce, said he.

I pounced on the papyrus of the Egyptians
They wouldn't play so I stole their feather pens
I pounced on the fish caught by James and John
They fed me fish then the pounce went on.

I pounced on the Sabbath, rubbed my head against the lame.
Many people shook their head, said this feline was insane.
I may nap after pouncing, do not think I am gone.
For I just saw a rat, so the pounce goes on.

I and my lady meowed a song across the plain
The birds came down, and we pounced on each of them.
On the bedchamber floor, I laid my carrion.
Then I raced out the door and I pounced again.

I dog jumped down, so I leapt up high.
I have nine lives that will never, never die.
I'll pounce on you though you bark at me
I am the Lord of the Pounce, said he.
Track Name: I'll Tell My Cat
I'll tell my cat when I come home,
“Leave the furniture alone.”
She tore my sheets and shred my couch.
I'm tired of coming home a grouch.

But she is loving. She is pretty.
And I am so whipped by my kitty.
Her claws catch my sleeve, rips 1, 2, 3
Please won't you leave the curtains be.

I tell her each morning that I love her.
But my shoes need laces so please don't chew 'em.
She mews real sweet then knocks over a candle
Now she's gnawing on my sandles.

Out of the bathroom she struts quite bold,
A roll of toilet paper clung to her toe.
I really wonder if I will kill her
When her mouth has feathers from my pillow.

Let the thunder storms crash all night long
She'll be too scared to rend my thong.
She may be shivering from fright,
But at least this weekend I'll have my tights.

I bought her a scratch post of her own.
So she'll leave my living room alone.
But I come home to see only fluff and filling
If she hadn't just meowed, there'd be a killin'.

–last chorus–
She is loving. She is pretty.
And I am so whipped by my kitty.
Her claws catch my sleeve, rips 1, 2, 3
I never liked those curtains anyway.
Track Name: The Cat Came Back... Cat's Perspective
I was a crazy cat for many a year,
My years are advancing. Now I sleep in my chair.
But old Mr. Johnson still wants me to play
If I don’t get active, he’ll send me away.

I’m a yellow tabby, kinda flabby. And I’m coming home.
And if you don’t like me, then leave me alone!
I’ll eat when I’m hungry. I’ll sleep when I’m tired.
And if you try to wake me, you’ll wish you had died.

His neighbor ambushed me with shotgun and dynamite.
My cat senses warned me. So I put up a fight.
I clawed at his cigarette. It fell to the floor.
It lit the dynamite as I ran out the door.

He gave me to a boy with a dollar and a note
To drown me in the river when we were afloat.
I saw the rope come towards me and let out a yowl.
The boat tipped on over. The poor boy was drowned.

He gave me to a man going up in a balloon.
I clung to his head. I am no buffoon.
The man tried to free me, but then lost control.
I stole his parachute as he crashed ‘gainst a knoll.

He took me to the mill where the meat was ground.
He left off the lights, so I wouldn’t look around.
But I saw that food processor come closer to me,
I jumped to the floor. He tripped bloodily.

Mr. Johnson, Mr. Johnson, I know you hate me,
But I have nine lives and you haven’t even three.
Blessed are the cat lovers. Blessed are all kitties
So love me or leave me alone for to sleep.
Track Name: Black Is the Color (Of My Cat's Fur)
Black is the color of my cat’s fur.
Her whiskers are like the finest myrrh
She has the kindest eyes and the gentlest paws
I love the ground whereon they fall.

I love my cat, and well, she knows.
I love the nails, I clip from her toes
At the end of the day, I come home to her
Craddled in my arms, I massage her neck. She purrs.

Black is the color of my cat’s fur.
Her whiskers are like the finest myrrh
She has kindest eyes and the gentlest paws
I love the ground whereon they fall.

I’ll go to the pound, and I’ll mourn and weep.
Till the stray kill laws, they no more will keep.
(I’ll) Write Congress this letter beg them to spare cat lives.
I’ll ask you to share this songs a thousand times.

Black is the color of my cat’s fur.
Her whiskers are like the finest myrrh
She has kindest eyes and the gentlest paws
I love the ground whereon they fall.
Track Name: The Demented Cat Game
Come all ye young fellows and listen while I sing
For the love of a kitty cat is terrible thing.
He'll banish your senses. You'll be prisoner to his pain.
And he'll make you a part of the demented cat game.

My name it is Marc Gunn, and I'm nearly thirty-three.
My home is in Austin, where two cats live with me.
Well I've known all my life that all cats are insane
Yet I still fell in love with the demented cat game.

These two cats of mine have terrorized me.
My home is too small for their cat tyranny.
But still Tiziano is greatly to blame
He meows and I melt in the demented cat game.

I came in and saw Torre stretched out on his chair.
His sleepy eyes saw me smile at his stare.
His fine body stretched, then his tongue licked his mane.
Contorting his neck in the demented cat game.

It's nearly two years since these two cats moved in.
The sofa's now covered with the scent of cat chin.
Well I read about felines, and never wanted the same.
Until I became part of the demented cat game.

I lie in my bed and on me my cats lie
I see Torre legs bend he's ready to fly.
He jumps on my tummy. I give thanks for the pain.
And the explosive nature of the demented cat game.
Track Name: Black Kitty Paw
Her eyes they glowed like the moonlight.
She strolled like a Queen her head tall.
Her furr had a sheen of obsidion,
She helped shine with her black kitty paw.

In a neat little town they call Belfast,
To an Irish Setter I was bound.
And many’s the hour of sweet happiness
I played catch with that little hound.
Til a sad misfortune befell him.
I swore no other dog I’d belong.
That’s when bad luck turned to good fortune
When I saw that black kitty paw

As I was strolling quite lonely,
My thoughts on the best friend of man,
A black cat crossed in front of me,
And made me think I was damned.
But she dropped right down in front of me.
Her back rubbed the ground as she sprawled.
And a smile crept on my dark face
Bewitched by her black kitty paw.

Well she stayed by my side til the morning
And meowed when my tears hit the ground
As if saying, “Smile, my young fellow,
There are plenty other doggies around.”
For seven short months, we were together.
She stayed by my side through it all.
Til I finally felt willing for another pup,
All thanks to the black kitty paw.

So come all ye superstitious fellows
I’ll have take a listen to me.
If black cats e’er cross your path
Remember my kitty colleen.
Well she loved with complete surrender
Showed me how through dispair to stand tall
Now whenever I’m filled with depression
I remember my black kitty paw!
Track Name: Catnipping Green
As I roved on outside one evening so fair,
To pounce on small crickets and chase birds in the air,
I heard an old Tom cat a-singing a song,
Lying in catnips that’s mine before long.

Wrap me up in a fresh bed of catnip.
No more in my house I’ll be seen.
Just tell me old litter mates
It smells good and tastes great,
And I’ll see ye someday on Catnipping Green.

Now Catnipping Green is a place I’ve heard tell,
Where kitty cats go when their nine lives fail,
Where the sun beam is warm and the bird wings are frayed,
And there’s nary a pussy cat around that’s been spayed.

When your locked up inside, and your humans leave too,
There’s mices that scuttle, and laces on shoes.
There’s bubbles of catnip that blow ’round freely.
And the fawcets have milk that turn on when you sing.

Where there’s plenty to climb and no vets to impale,
And you pounce on a fish bowl with a flick of your tail,
Where you lie at your leisure and clean your fur too,
Though I guess that’s no different than you normally do.

Now I don’t want a human to dote over me.
Well maybe a neck rub, then I’ll leave for the green.
And other cats will sniff the catnip on my paws,
Then meow as they pounce on me while singing this song.
Track Name: Furagone's Wake
Tim Furagone lived on Walklin Street
A gentle Sphynx Cat mighty odd.
He had a meow both thick and sweet,
And to jump off a fence he’d land with a thod.
Now the cat had a sorta nibbler’s way.
For the love of the herb he was born
And to help him on his way each day,
He’d roll in the catnip every morn.

A whack for the dog,
Then dance with all laughter
Round the floor a rat’s tail chase.
Jump on a shelf. Now what will we shatter?
Lots of fun at Furagone’s Wake.

One morning Tim pounced on a fowl
Up on a roof top. His paws did skate.
He fell from the roof, his ninth life gone,
They carried him home his corpse to wake.
They rolled him up in a shredded bed sheet,
And laid him out in his cat bed
With a bottle of milk at his tail
And a ball of string at his head.

The Tom cats gathered at the wake.
A fluffy Persian brought a fish for lunch.
A Calico shared his tuna fish cake.
While an Abysinnian lapped catnip punch.
Then Kitty O’Brian began to cry,
“Mreooooow, it’s sad to see!
Such a young cat to lose nine lives.”
“Will ye bite your tail,” said Paddy Furry

Then Maggie O’Mackrel took up the yowl,
“Oh Kitty,” says she, “Go tend your fur.”
Then Kitty bit her on the paw,
And sent them clawing on the floor.
Then a Cat Fight did soon engage.
It was Manx to Manx,
And Tab to Tab.
Whiskers and fur flew round insane.
Some wounds we lick will never scab.

Then Sean Abysinn ducked his head
When a bucket of catnip flew at him.
It missed and landed on the cat bed.
The catnip scattered all over Tim.
Well the strength of the herb gave him life once more.
Tim leaped like a lion from the bed,
Growling, “For Bast’s sake, bite your fur!
If ye waste my catnip, you’ll make me mad!’
Track Name: Jasper Tabby Kitty Cat-y
As I went down to the feline market,
Feline market to adopt a kitty,
I fell in love with a sweet grey tabby
With the greenest eyes you’ve ever seen.

Jasper tabby, kitty cat-y
Jasper tabby cat kitty
Jasper Kitty tabby cat-y
The greenest eyes you’ve ever seen.

He meowed to me that he was lonely.
Tired of roaming streets you see.
He purrs while I massage his neck
And cradle him like a baby.

Before I wake up every morning,
He’d wake up and walk on me,
Bite my hair and chat real loudly
Didn’t he know I was trying to sleep?

He won’t drink water from his cat bowl
Waits till the fawcett is turned on
When I don’t follow his instructions
He nips my ankles and meows this song.

Now he’s hissing at my new kitties
Growling loudly, green eyes glaring
Hell hath no furry like Jasper Kitty
With the greenest eyes you’ve ever seen.